Brown Thank You

yo peeps,

I'm here again bringing you yet another thank you card. :P Thank you cards go so fast. I don't think I have any right now... (aka I should probably make some more).

Anywho, I wanted to share a little something that I've been thinking about recently.

In the Christian realm it seems quite common for us single girls (and guys too) to put together a list of some of the things we're looking for in a future spouse. It's basically our way of fantasizing about what our partner will be like.

Handsome/Beautiful? Check.
Committed? Check.
Honest? Check.
Godly? Without a doubt.

But as I've been thinking about this recently, I don't think it's very healthy. I mean there's nothing wrong with wanting our future spouse to be any of those things (Some of them are really good!) but I think that sometimes we can get a little over-obsessed with it.

Do we really need to have a written list of all the things we want our spouse to be? Probably not. Should we be concerned with who we consider marrying? Absolutely! But something that us single people have to remember is that our future spouse is going to be human too. And they're going to mess up sometimes, just like we will. (Shocker, right?)

The main thing I don't like about these "future spouse lists" as we'll call them, is that they set unreal expectations. It's almost like "well, if you're not all of these things then I'm not going to love you".

Girls, you're never going to find the perfect guy. And guys, it's the same for you. There's no perfect person out there.

Now, I'm not advocating that you just go and marry whomever. Marriage is something you should think long and hard about before diving in.

But don't get too focused on the other person. Instead examine yourself and enjoy this season of singleness without being obsessed with finding the right person.

<3 ashley="" p="">


  1. Great reminder Ashley! I kind of think the only thing that need be on a "list" is that they be a Godly Christian and that's it. After all its like you said, we are all humans after all. We tend not to fit into list and categories that are made by someone else (and if you have found anything who totally fits a list made by someone else who didn't know them I would love to meet them). Again great reminder!

    1. Thanks for the comment rockie! I love hearing from you! It's great to hear a guys perspective on this too. I think that is girls can be more guilty of the list thing than you guys so I'm glad you thought it was good. I totally agree with that. As long as you find someone who's seeking God and wanting to grow in their Christian walk. Thanks for reading... I know my recent posts have been kinda long and rant-like ;)

    2. No problem! I've kind of been incognito from the blogger world right now since the class I was taking was demanding (a goo demanding) Oh, I know guys also like to have "list" of what they want. Wait scratch that guys are more desperate so they have a "type". I just find all that rather annoying. I totally don't mind the rant-y post! *because I want to do one on Dr. Strange* :D

    3. Yes incognito... that's a good word. I love learning new words from writer friends :D haha but yes the type thing can be pretty annoying too. Well I'm glad to hear that! I personally like more of a rant type post (if it's not too long) because it definitely seems more like the real you and not a person you pretend to be on the internet. Ooh I'll look forward to reading it o.o

  2. Good blog...the only list that really matters is the one in the Book :-)

    1. Sorry forgot to ID myself...Pastor Adrian


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